The 1st pebble for the jar

It finally all got started today. I had the first of 30 radiotherapy sessions.

The day began with a trip to a totally different hospital this morning taking my youngest to the minor injuries unit. He got smashed on the nose at rugby. Took the time whilst we were waiting to tuck into a fry-up…and the dietition thought I might not have an appetite, PISH. A jolly nurse saw him and said that when the swelling has gone down in 7-10 days then bring him back if he is deformed. I liked the way she phrased it.

Zoomed from there to school where I saw a few colleagues, which was nice, and then to my hospital. Ushered through to brand new away station. Met companions along the road to recovery. Everyone seemed upbeat. I think they could tell I was nervous. When I was asked through I saw the behemoth of the machine that is to cure me. Very sci-fi. I was almost introduced to it by the radiotherapist who took me on a full tour. I zoned out at times due to the general cacking myself feel. I forgot to get changed before I came into the machine room and therefore today I was treated ‘tits out’. A bit chilly in the room as parts of my body showed. Certainly no frill and incredibly functional was the order of the day. The treatment was to last for about 20 mins…mask on and music started. I cannot explain the restriction you feel n the room. The mask ties you to the bed and of course movement by you means that they might zap the wrong area. As it is saliva, speech, taste will all go wrong during the process so do not want to cause myself more difficulties. The CD that was playing was gentle music and was soothing until the CD got stuck on ‘Dancing in the Moonlight’ which it then repeated for about 5 minutes…at that point, tied down and listening to the repeat it took me back to Vietnam…and by that I mean the classic Rambo and Missing in Action films. Think happy thoughts! Think happy thoughts! Tried to play a round of golf in my head but amazingly I was just as crap as I am in real life so that got frustrating. Definitely need some help with relaxing. Need about 18-20 mins of chill.

The pebble in the jar has now moved and only 29 to go. Good to have started. Feel almost elated tonight because of that but not helped by the fact our heating is buggered and I have a 1720 appointment tomorrow.

Check out my mask and faceless others on a rack at the link below.


Day 1ish

Bit of a bizarre day, Was all set for the first treatment only to be told that it could not be done. The Doctor said it was something to do with ‘quality assurance’ and who am I to disagree with someone who was at University for so long…I did hear a whisper that one of the machines was up the spout. Not a complete waste of journey to the North Middlesex hospital as saw the Consultant, the dietician and the speech and language therapist. The dietician asked if I had a good appetite. I felt like suggesting that she look at the tummy mound in front of her but stopped myself and just said’yes, I like food’. She said that I will need a stomach tube by about week 3, called a PEG. This will need to be surgically done so it looks like more hospital food for me. Still I know the drill as I seem to have been in and out so often. The language and speech person gave me jaw, tongue and cheek exercises to try and help with swallowing so that I can eat proper food for as long as possible. All of the pain and problems yet they want me to not lose much weight. This will be a challenge. Not sure how lard will inject. Tried my beautiful mask on again and it still fits despite Larry the Lump gaining his own weight. Assured that the lump will decrease in size with Chemotherapy. Met the Chemo team and went to have blood tests…interesting as I write it seems like I did a lot today but at the time seemed to be a lot of waiting around.

So,,,first day tomorrow and a finish on Saturday this week. No pebbles moved in the jars Ali has got me yet.